2.8 – Death Visits the Diabolicals for the First Time

5th update!  Two more for silver and halfway to gold!

Last time, Mad Fireball was born, Rosie got promoted, but was also turned down for a date with Isaiah, and Macavity finally killed Lynx.  *checks notes*  Yep, that’s about right.

Let’s begin, shall we?


Someone’s rather chipper today.

Max:  Ah, yes, it is a fine day to ruin family-owned businesses!



Hans is actually being productive today!  Good man!


Hans:  The burn!  I feel it!


He’s not the only one, though.  Lili’s gotta burn off that baby gat if she’s to be a proper Emperor of Evil!

Yes, very good!  Almost there!  However, as you’ll, see she’ll be slowed down a bit later on.

If you are of the rare breed of astute readers, you may have noticed that Moriarty hasn’t much appeared as of late.

That’s because he’s my slave!  >:D

We’ve discovered that Mori doesn’t burn out in the sun like Kitty did way back when.  And he got an opportunity to collect gems and metals for the science center.  So guess what he’s doing?


Mori:  I hate my life.

Yes, yes, shh and be off to the next diamond.


What?!  Welp, the house did cost a pretty penny…


Oh no you don’t!


Don’t you dare!


You little effer!  That table’s been here longer than Lili has!  😡

Look at his smug little grin!  *gnashes teeth*  Max promptly disables the maid service.


What?!  NO!  Kitty!  WHY?!  T_T

She was at the park and, I swear to any deity you want, there was no one around.  But her Faithful moodlet is gone!  Minion doesn’t understand!  T_T


Just in time to cheer me up, Lili pops with her and Hans’ second baby.  Yeah, they rolled the wish as soon as Mad Fireball came home.  So I let them.

Lili then tends to the child she already has.


Lili:  Aren’t you cute!


Lili:  It’s crying again!  Why is it crying?!

Check her diaper!  No?!  Nope.  She’s just screaming to scream. *sighs*  Mad Fireball just does occasionally:  scream her head off for no apparent reason!  I hate babies.

Speaking of babies, both Lili and Hans want another girl, so Kitty is sent out at some point to obtain more watermelons.


In other news, right before baby popping, Lili did manage to max out her Athletics skill!  Woo!


You may be asking yourself, why did Fluffy take this?  Because that fly is incredibly detailed.  Seriously, it’s creepy.


And also this.  Cute Dinah is cute!  ^_^


And while we’re on the subject of cats, here is Macavity hoping Rosie drops something while she’s cooking.  Or making her drop something with his mind powers.  Whichever.


When Max arrives home, he is immediately surrounded by all his cats, waiting to greet him.  Total # of Cats in the room: 6.

What’s with all these randomly strung together pictures?  You, dear reader, may think I’m stalling.  You would be correct.  But nothing can stall the inevitable.


Max!  What’s wrong?!  Scary music is playing!

Max:  *gasp*  Dinah!


Max: Dinah!

Dinah!  T_T


Even Macavity balls his eyes out as the Grim Reaper arrives to take his mother away.


Max:  He’s taking my cat!  Kitty!  He’s taking my Dinah!  *balls some more*

Kitty:  Dear…there’s nothing I can do.


At least Grim seems to be a cat person.  😦


And so Dinah vanished up to cat heaven.


And all grieved deeply.


Max grieved the most.  T_T


But the Reaper didn’t stop there!  Oh no!  Kick us while we’re down!  T_T


Nikita only lasted a few more hours than her dear friend.  She died doing what she loved though!  Hunting and killing things!  T_T


And away she goes, to hunt angels in the afterlife!  T_T


Farewell Nikita Diabolical, padder of the family coffers and vicious defender, you will be missed.  T_T

Nikita was 57 days old and died on the 2nd day (Monday) of the 9th week of the Diabolical legacy.


Rest in peace Dinah Diabolical, the sweetest Diabolical there will ever be.  T_T

Dinah was 54 days old and died on the 2nd day (Monday) of the 9th week of the Diabolical legacy.

I think we’ll call it here folks.  See you next time for, hopefully, happier times.  T_T

Thanks for reading.

1.17 – Consecutive Confusion

It’s Monday, isn’t it…crap.

Last time was a big hullabaloo of an update just to catch up to where we are. Max sent his only children off to an unknown land to educate themselves—

Max: It is referred to as ‘tough love’.

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Stop interrupting! And Kitty vomited over some old lasagana, there was some weird cat hanging around and something occurred up in the dark, unused room upstairs. Care to explain, Dinah?

Dinah: Meowr?

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You shifty kitty! No, you are NOT innocent! Your innocence was stolen—!

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Wuh?! Nikita?! *Minion spluttering* Where the hell’ve you been?!

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Nikita: *Wouldn’t you like to know*

Welp! That’s what happens when you leave a world alone too long. Your bread-winning cat runs off somewhere, isn’t seen for two days and comes back pregnant! Huh. Kinda like real life. Good one, EA!

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Wait, what?! I knew it! Innocent my ass! Boo’s going! (Boo was the male cat pictured last time…utterly useless)

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Dah fuck?!?! No chimes! What?!?!

*whimpers* I wasn’t prepared for this! ;_;

Max: Will you now cease your idiotic blathering?! I have a wish.

*whimpers more* Stupid Woohooer mod! >.< And no, Max! We’re already getting more cats!

A plot was hatched to abort a few pregnancies…but this Minion is not so heartless. Even if it would be a lot more convenient. Also out of curiosity, since we have no idea who the father of Nikita’s kittens even is. Do cats have family trees? Discuss!

Anywho! During this time of confusion and frantic rule scanning, the twins called up!

Kitty: Oh, sweeties, are you alr—

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Kitty: Is this how I raised you?

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Swiftly followed by

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From my notes: “No longer giving fucks.”

Now, before pregnancy, Nikita spent every waking moment stalking for prey. Now, all she does is snooze. Huh. Cute.

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All Dinah has ever done is snooze and look cute.

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Which is all she needs to do! ❤

Then Kitty stole the spotlight by going into labor in the middle of a commercial shoot.

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With little fuss, Kitty got herself in a limo and took off for the hospital. No messing about with this lady.

Max was close behind.

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Max: Babies are serious business.

You can’t fool me! You lost your Best Dad award when you shipped the girls off to boarding school! T_T

But despite the confusion and inconvenience of it all, a baby boy was born.

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Let’s welcome young Moriarty! A Brave Genius born on a dreary Spring Wednesday at 3:26 pm, Moriarty enjoys a fine plate of vegetarian grilled salmon, R&B music and the color green. He is a Pisces.

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And he’s a vampire! Please have your mom’s eyes. *fingers crossed*

Kitty: I thought he was just a spare.

I might reconsider his position.  >.>  IF he has your eyes!  Speaking of IF.

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This one will NOT be neglected! 😡 Minion wants an Imaginary Friend!

Max: Who even are these people?!

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No idea! 😀 But whatevs! Imaginary Friends!

This is young Moriarty’s nursery.

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Quickly now! We have other things to do! Besides, he’s not very interesting right now.

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Much more things happened! Like Nikita giving birth! Kittens! 😀

Max is suitably excited, but Kitty’s not impressed.

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Max: My kitten had kittens! ^_^

You’re almost adorable. O_O

Kitty: Meh. Been there, done that, didn’t squeal half as much.

True story.

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Lol! Cat birthing faces. XD

But with sparkles, came kittens. Meet Azrael (boy) and Rakshasa (girl). Neither have Nikita’s lovely blue eyes. Poo.

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So far Rakshasa’s my favorite. Hint: she’s NOT the one bitching about the baby. Though they look the same for the most part.

And we also get to know who their father is!

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Corwin Phillips. We have no idea who he is and neither does Nikita. O.o Bug?

Azrael and Rakshasa were born on Love Day at 2:06pm. Azrael is Neat and Adventurous, while Rakshasa is Playful and Adventurous. They’re both fucking adorable.

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But then they were upstaged by Dinah! When she gave birth! Making a kawaii face the entire time! XD

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And then exploding into a nova! A doubly tired nova!

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Two more kittens were added to the family. Born on Love Day at 11:42pm.

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They have different colored eyes! O.o I didn’t know that was a thing! So cu—

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Meep! O_O

Macavity: *evil snigger*

Max! MAX! The kitten’s possessed! Ma—what’re you doing?!

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Lynx: Halp!

Bad kitty! Bad kitt—Meep! O_O

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Meanwhile, upstairs, all alone, a tiny vampire ages up.

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I played this yesterday and it took up 5 (ish?) in-game days.  So much happened!  My head is still spinning!

So, I have a few notes for you guys.

One:  The family tree has been updated.  The Diabolical Who’s Who has been updated.  All new babies/kittens have been added.

Two:  HALP!  I need names.  Having so many kittens made me realize I don’t know enough evil cat names.  Or evil names in general.  So if YOU think of one, put it in the comments!

Three:  I’m considering having reader-chosen heirs rather than going with the first-born.  This legacy might have enough followers for an heir poll later.  What do you guys think?